Three sentence movie reviews: XXX

I think the problem with this movie is that it wasn’t campy enough to be a campy send up and it was entirely too ridiculous to be accepted as an action flick. When your main character launches a dirt bike up over the drug cartel’s fence, pulls himself and the dirt bike into a horizontal position to avoid being skewered on the fence then pulls the dirt bike up and himself back on it to land with no injury even the most physics-adverse action fan must roll their eye. Still, I quite enjoyed it,* mostly because Vin Diesel smiled a lot, which he usually doesn’t get to do in his beefy, action flick rolls.

*indeed, I had been in a funk all week and after the movie was over I found myself in a surprisingly cheerful mood. Can XXX cure depression?