Three sentence movie reviews: Jumper
It turns out that having Darth Vader Billy Elliott and Nick Fury in the same movie doesn’t mean that it will be a good movie. The reason to watch this is because Jamie Bell (the aforementioned Billy Elliott) is quite fun in his slightly unhinged character. Samuel Jackson is good too, but that Hayden Christensen, he’s too pretty and he knows it.
Here also is a second three-sentence review from my usually squelched feminist movie critic who just couldn’t lay dormant. This review contains SPOILERS but the movie isn’t very good and you aren’t going to watch it, so read on.
Can we just say, “Totally lame abusive relationship?” Guy shows up after seven years, guy whisks girl away to Rome with absolutely no explanation, then guy starts ordering girl to do things without explaining the situation to her AND SHE DOES? And then at the end, despite the fact that the Paladins are going to go after her family and kill all of them, she stays with him?
Cost: Free from library
Where watched: At home.